That’s pretty much it for today. Work, tutoring, home to fix supper, gymnastics (pick up cookies while Michaela is at gymnastics), pick up Michaela, home, kids to bed, run to store for milk, ready for bed.
But, daily routine is not what I wanted to blog about tonight anyway. I’m in a funk right now. I hate feeling like this. Everything is irritating me. Things that should not be irritating me are and it just drives me nuts. It’s like being stuck in someone else’s skin. Yes, it is about PMS time, but it’s not just that. That actually has been MUCH better since last August.
It’s this time of year. I am a person who generally loves all four seasons. I feel amazingly blessed that I was born in a place that gets all four seasons. I love the heat and freedom of summer. I love the bright colors and brisk temperatures of fall. I love snow and bundling up next to a fire in winter. I love the freshness and newness of spring.
However, I do suffer from seasonal depression and I hate it. It’s basically caused by limited sunlight. It doesn’t help that there are no windows in my classroom, either. Fluorescent lighting is not a good substitute for natural sunlight.
Add to that, this part of the school year is just stressful. On one hand, it just feels so long. Third quarter just always seems to feel a lot longer than the other three quarters. But, on the other hand it’s going too fast and I always start to panic that I’m not going to get my students through everything I need to get them through.
Anyway, it just makes me want to either hide from everyone and hurt someone. I can’t stand feeling this way. I haven’t even really been talking to my friends lately because I don’t know how to say things without my irritation and nastiness showing. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings or be unduly mean. If I had a cabin somewhere in a secluded forest, I’d go there and just hide under the covers by myself for a while. Maybe a punching bag would help.
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